Bear-Faced Cheek [or W.C. Meeting]
When you lift a toilet seat you don’t expect to see
A massive, floating insect the size of you or me –
Well, some exaggeration, but legs and wings are spread
From bowl side to the other. I hope that it is dead.
It looks so black and bulbous yet nothing like a bee
Or wasp or even hornet. There are no stripes to see.
However did it get there? It doesn’t bear to think.
Perhaps it buzzed around at night and flew in for a drink.
I cover it with paper, try prodding with the brush.
When still there is no sign of life I give the loo a flush.
You’d think the thing would vanish. I press the flush once more
Then watch the wretched beast pop up much bigger than before.
I’m feeling rather vulnerable, especially bare-arsed –
There may not be a quorum but the motion will be passed.